I've always wanted to stay "real" in this journey, not to scare anyone away but to be honest about the difficulties.
We looked into adoption for 10+ years before starting this journey.
I read, and read, and read
Country information, Agency information
Blogs, Books, Seminars
Did we know it was going to be hard?
Yes.
Is it harder than we thought?
Beyond hard.
Would we enter this journey again?
No question.
Why?
Here's why:
He's completely worth it!
So, here is the latest.
We are in need of constant prayer, a crying out to God on behalf of J.
Without weighing you down trying to understand the Ha*ti adoption process,
I will try to make it brief, yet somewhat understandable.
We need his birth certificate to get his passport and to get him home.
And, we've reached a road block.
Basically, in Ha*ti, they keep these "books" or a 3-ring binder where they write the names for documents.
When an "archive", such as the birth certificate, is needed, the book where the child's name is written is requested, sent to the capitol, and the archive retrieved to be legalized.
The book cannot go to the capital until it has been "completed."
Many names are written in this book.
A book was sent to the capital that supposedly had his name in it.
It was the wrong book.
The book was returned to Cap.
Found out that the book his name is in is not finished.
It's a BIG book.
It cannot be sent for the birth certificate until it is finished.
Our attorney attempted to get a judgment to by-pass this.
Although this has been allowed before, ours was denied.
Now, we must wait for the book. For as long as it takes.
How long? No one knows.
The clerk knows that we need the book for the archive.
But, he is not giving a timeframe.
I admit it: I'm helpless.
Hardest thing as a parent is to sit by and do nothing
& trust that others have the same interest in your child as you do.
I really can do nothing but that.
When I saw this picture, I wondered. . .does he dream of us?
But now, I pray he does not.
I hope that he is content where he is.
I hope he feels loved where he is.
Because, the brokenness that occurs when first learning of another delay,
is a horrible feeling.
I never want him to feel that.
Until we reach him, we pray happiness & joy for him each day.
Contentment where he is.
Even when his friends go home.
Even when he looks at our pictures.
The craziness in all of this is that I have been in a fervent study on the power of prayer.
Now, entering a study on the power of our God.
Learning that although 2 million Jews left Egypt, only 2 made it into the promised land.
I claimed to God that I want to live "promised land living".
I want to experience the miracles that He does on our behalf.
That I love learning, and I love good teaching, but that I want to experience more. . .
I want to hear Him speak, watch Him move, and be a part of a Red Sea experience.
He is the same God of the Israelites, but I don't want to stay the same woman I was yesterday.
Hmmmm. . .is this how He is answering? Am I failing each test that He brings to me? Is He putting me in a place where I see the "sea" before me and thousands of "Egyptians" coming after me? A place where there is NO WAY that I can manipulate the situation, where I can make things happen?
Well, I'm here Lord. I cannot change this for J. I don't want him to wait longer for home just for me to experience this miracle.
For all those reading this, I admit. . .from this point on, just know, if things move quickly, it will ONLY be the hand of God parting the sea.
So, we could use your prayers.
Crying out prayers on J's behalf.
We need a softened heart in the clerk's office. Wisdom for our attorney. Communication quickly with our agency. Peace for us.
We are reaching out asking for you to enter into this for us.
We are tired.
And, our faith falters at times.
Will you stand in the gap for us?
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