Hi everyone,
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| *Awkward desk selfie* |
Starting a new job/internship/college course etc is always tough. It's emotionally and physically draining and you find yourself exhausted as you frantically try to adjust to your new schedule. I did it twice in the last three months, and it really contributed to my creative block/disinterest. I frequently found myself so tired that I would simply roll out of bed and put on whatever was comfortable, convenient, or just there. There was also the practical elements of my new jobs to take into account; when you're sitting at an office desk for 8 hours, you want to be comfortable. When you're moving around a lot, you have to be able to. If you're standing for long periods of time, you need comfortable shoes. If you're sitting under the air conditioning, you want to be warm.
All of these things combined led to me feeling very restricted in what I could wear and just very disinterested. I would get up in the morning, get dressed in whatever was clean and not think twice about it. Same with makeup. I got into a pattern of wearing the same things again and again. I even stopped wearing lipstick (if you're new here, scroll through my last few posts and you'll get why that's' a big deal) because it would just come off anyway.
I understand that this probably seems very trivial and shallow to a lot of you (I am well aware that this falls into the category of 'firstworldiest of First World problems'). For a lot of people, getting up and dressed in whatever is there is probably standard. But I've always been some who enjoyed putting thought into what they wore, liked the process of picking out clothes, and that would plan outfits (and makeup) in advance. And suddenly I didn't have that anymore. Everything just became very mechanical and uninteresting. I didn't write, because I didn't have anything to write about.
So what changed? A few things, actually. As I mentioned earlier, I graduated from college a few weeks ago, so that meant or the first time in ages, I had to go out into the shops and find something to wear. I cut 8 inches off my hair (I now have something of a lob), the most significant change I've made to my appearance in a while, so that sort of forced me to experiment again with hairstyles and products in order to figure out what worked. The shops started stocking autumn/winter clothes and suddenly I say things that I liked. I got into YouTube again and started watching people like Christine, who have a very distinct sense of style. But to to be honest, there was no big 'Voila!' moment where lightening struck and time froze and I suddenly felt inspired to put thought into my clothes again. My interest just gradually came make to me.
And now here I am. I titled this post here we go again, because I'm back, at least for now, and I have a lot of ideas for upcoming posts. I'd like to try and branch out a bit just from makeup (although I have a feeling I've said that before) into fashion and style and tutorials. Although there will still be a lot of posts about lipstick, I promise.
I know this is a slightly different post to what you normally see on here (I think it's the longest one I've ever written), but I just wanted to be honest about why I've been away for so long. It's also really gotten me thinking about the idea of creative blocks in general and the best method of dealing with them. I just waited mine out, but I often wonder if just forcing myself to write would have worked just as well. If you have any input or thoughts on the subject, or have any similar experiences, I would love to know.
Till next time,
Ciara
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